I'd like to talk about etiquette for a moment. Ahem. Bathroom etiquette.I don't know about you, but there are certain rules I follow when in the bathroom. Some of them are universal, and others are not.
The seat - well, that's universal. Washing hands - that is too. Replacing the end of a loo roll when it runs out? Natch.
In the office though, things aren't always that clear. And in MY office, where you could be in the bathroom with 19 other women at the one time - our bathroom is like one big long battery egg farm, stretching out into the distance with a never ending row of cubicles all slightly too small to be properly comfortable (I mean really, why didn't they make it 15 cubicles and give us enough room to turn around properly??) - there you are, with lots of other people.
Other people who have..... different rules.
The reason I'm writing this post is because my notions of etiquette have recently been affronted, in the office bathroom. Twice in two days!
First of all I had to contend with someone talking on their phone. To a real person. While they were using the cubicle - if you get my drift. And that was awful. I can cope with that though, if I must (and must I? really? can you not leave your damn phone on your damn desk where it damn well belongs?), because that kind of happens "around" you rather than directly involving you.
But if it wasn't bad enough, then today I was cornered by the Bathroom Talker. The Bathroom Talker! I hate the bloody Bathroom Talker.
I was just going into a cubicle when the Bathroom Talker came out of one, and spotted me, and said hello, and I said hello back, and that's where things should have politely and cordially ended.
But no. The Bathroom Talker continued to engage me in conversation as she washed her hands, and I squirmed with awkwardness (from behind my closed door) and she wasn't even just babbling on about drivel, she was actually conducting a serious conversation she expected me to contribute to. In a meaningful and intellectual way. Seriously. And this is not an isolated incident - she does it all the time!!
I mean, is it just me, or is that behaviour com-PLETE-ly inappropriate?!? It's wrong, people, it's wrong! Bathroom etiquette states that unless you are both standing at the basin chatting together, you do not have the conversation in the bathroom. Certainly not while one of you is IN the cubicle and all she wants to do is to wee in peace.
Good lord. Completely affronted, I tell you, completely affronted. I'm going to have to start posting a lookout for this woman, and that is just at the very wrong end of extreme measures.
image courtesy of Getty Images
